Toner Lung Relapse

After an unexpected five-month holiday, I finally returned to being gainfully employed in February. I returned to Tax Place. Not surprisingly, it is much the same as it was last year. Everyone, with the exception of two temps, is still there. I'm sitting in the same cubicle. I'm assembling the same e-file returns for a lot of the same clients. And I think I'm once again suffering from Toner Lung. I remember my fellow temp, M, complaining of mysteriously swollen glands last year. I've noticed that my own glands have become perceptibly larger over the past week, but I thought it was due to a recent cold. I didn't associate this telltale symptom with Toner Lung until today when, in the course of trying to clear a jam in the copier, I found my face in very close proximity to the acrid fumes it produces.

Suddenly everything fell into place. The excessive thirst. Dry, chapped hands. Fatigue. Grogginess. All symptoms that I also experienced last year and that led me to postulate about the existence of the disease in the first place. And this strain of Toner Lung seems to be more severe than ever before. Last year, one of the accountants provided evidence of the respiratory difficulties associated with Toner Lung by clearing his throat almost incessantly. This year, the "Ahm" and "Hrrrrm" to which I had grown accustomed have escalated to a full range of horribly phlegmatic noises. Rather than giving a simple cough, he now sounds as if he's blatantly trying to dislodge a fairly sizable loogie.

I've also noticed strange behaviour from another accountant. Now that M is no longer here to captivate the wheezy preparer, I've seen a lot less of him back by our cubicles. Instead, I've been hearing far more from B. Last year he confined himself to asking me what I was listening to on my iPod. Now it's become much more personal. I'd grown out my hair a bit last year, and it was too long to spike it up as I usually do. I'd forgotten about this change in coiffure until B started constantly teasing me about it.

"What'd'you call that?" he asked, gesturing to my hair. "The Rooster?" Another day he greeted me by calling out, "Hey, Spike!"
Once he ran out of clever jokes about my hairstyle, he moved on to my nose stud. "Do you stick that on there or is it real?" he inquired.
"It's real," I answered. "I've had that for a while. I'm surprised you didn't notice it last year."
"Oh I noticed it," he sneered. "I just didn't say anything about it."
I'm beginning to suspect that the only explanation for this verbal diarrhea is that it's yet another symptom of Toner Lung.

But I don't have quite as much time to study the disease and its strange manifestations as I did last year. Since I already knew how to assemble completed returns, my supervisors decided to teach me how to scan tax documents into the computer. This new task is now the bane of my Tax Place existence. It involves sorting through the big mess of W2s, 1099s, 1098s and whatever else people send back with their tax organisers. Many people seem to have an annoying fondness for staples, paper clips and Post-It notes, all of which I must remove. I have to watch for marks in any highlighter colour other than yellow, since they will turn into black censor bars if scanned in black and white. And, unlike assembling, I can't fix a mistake without completely starting over. I don't have the ability to delete a page that might turn out wonky. Cultivating the eagle-eyed forethought necessary for this task has kept me far busier than I was last year.

Despite the scanning, I generally like being back at Tax Place. I'm getting paid, the passage of time has picked up considerable speed, and I'm treated quite well. But returning here has highlighted the main difference between my life now and my life then. I really miss Andy. We had just begun dating before I started this assignment last year, and my nearly constant love-stupid giddiness must have been apparent to others, too. Immediately upon walking in the door on my first day back, the receptionist called, "I saw you kissing a boy!" Seeing my confusion, she went on to explain that it had been around the time I'd been working there last year.
"I was going to say it must not have been any time recently," I replied, and explained the separate travel paths that we're currently navigating.
"Well, you looked really in love, and it was cute," she concluded.

And that is a big part of the reason why I'm also ready to be done with Tax Place. Unlike last year, where the end of my assignment meant only uncertainty and, eventually, a far worse temp assignment, this year I have a great deal to look forward to. By 15 April, there will only be two weeks left until Andy comes home. Soon after that I'll move out of my parents' house. I have fall classes to plan. And I've been working really hard to find a job I might actually enjoy by the time tax season is done. I'm feeling pretty optimistic and eager to move on to new things. And, of course, I need to recover from this new strain of Toner Lung.